Being retired and not re-employed (yet) has me analyzing my sense of worth. Right or wrong, in our society, a paycheck/job often equates literal worth. Many retirees report experiencing a new lack of status now that they have no job or reduced money. I struggle with these new perceptions of reduced worth as well. So before I get practical reconfiguring my lifestyle and budget, I take a look at some origins of my own worth.
It reminds me of the times when I was a stay-at-home mom with young children. As a young mom back then, at-home employment did not seem valued much in our society. My at-home job was hard for people to classify-and not deemed particularly crucial. Stay-at-home work consisted of those mundane “unimportant” activities- cooking, cleaning, doing errands, carpooling, and keeping curious toddlers educated, amused and away from self-destruction.
I Was Even A Baby-proofing Failure!
My toddler son used to bring me all the outlet plug covers with which I had carefully baby-proofed the house’s outlets. His methodical diligent removal of these plug covers just reinforced my feelings of irrelevance. (I was a baby proofing failure!) True relevance seemed to be in money earned, and a paycheck was much more important than stay-at-home duties. Incorrectly, that was how I felt sometimes back then. Retirement “status” causes inadequate feelings like these to still crop up now.
I reiterate healthy thinking- My worth is not my income. It was not then, and it is not now. In retirement, I also have the advantage of hindsight, something I did not as a young mom. I have accomplished some things over my years that I had not yet achieved then. Maybe those achievements can help me make more empowered decisions as I work out my life during my retirement phase.
Who Is Really Essential?
By the way, I thought covid revealed some hard truths about work and value in our consumeristic society. During covid times, who were the most “essential workers” among us? Ironically, they turned out to be those that did the most mundane, hands-on service jobs. Cooks and cleaners, grocery store personnel, delivery people, all became essential workers as we were shuttered in by the pandemic. Teachers and child care workers gained new respect as harried parents struggled to take over those child-rearing duties.
The paychecks of these essential workers mostly do not reflect the great importance that these workers truly have. Nor do they indicate the important role these essential workers assumed during strange covid times. That does say something about how our society has set up its priorities and rankings. I think these are values about due for change.
